Tuesday, 14 June 2011

The Queen's Meme #87 - The Crazy Medical Meme

Mimi of The Queen's Meme has sent this in....

Welcome to The Queen's Meme
7 Royal Questions on Tuesday
(I'm prolific today. There are 9 questions.)

It's time for your annual check up! I always say "knowledge is power" when entering the stressful confines of a doctor's office. I take a pen and paper, armed with questions and a medical encyclopedia at my disposal. My doctor is not amused. Let's see how well you do on the medical exam I have prepared for you.

The Crazy Medical Meme

1. The smallest bone in the human body is about the size of a grain of rice. What is it? The human brain? No, I thiuk it's one of the ear muscles.

2. How fast is a sneeze? Twice as fast as anyone has to get out of the way.

3. What percentage of the human body is water?  Just over 70%. We're damp squibs!

4. True or False: A human's thumb is as long as his or her nose. True, except in Pinoccheo's case.

5. What should you do if you are bitten by a snake? Panic.

6. It is a fact that humans get an entirely new skeleton every 12 years. What do we get every six years? I know about the seven year itch. Is it skin?

7. Happiness is directly related to the size of your _________________. Let's leave that blank. It's better that way.

8. If there are 9,000 taste buds on your tongue, how many hairs are on your head right now? If I can count them, not many.

9. I believe that the size of the needle is directly related to the mood of the nurse. However, sometimes it's necessary to get shots. If you could be vaccinated against anything in the world, what would it be? Nurses in a bad mood.

Saturday, 11 June 2011

GDIF Friday

Friday, June 10, 2011
G.D.I.F. (God damn it's Friday)

1) Many people who work a Monday through Friday job say T.G.I.F. (Thank God it's Friday). In my industry, Friday is the worst day of the week, so we say G.D.I.F. (God damn it's Friday). What is your worst day of the week?  Monday....the start of the working week. What a dopey question!

2) If you have a male dog and took it to a male veterinarian and the dog tried to kiss the vet, if the vet suddenly said "Woah! I don't swing that way. I don't kiss male dogs," would it send up a red flag to you that maybe your vet was having a little too much fun with female dogs or would you just think it's a bad joke? (This really happened to a person I know)    I'd ask the secretary if the vet had been fixed.

3) If you have a car, what is hanging from your rear view mirror? If you don't have one, what would you like to have hanging in a car?  The person who drives within an inch of the back on a busy highway.

4) I absolutely hate hummus. I can't stand it's baby poopish texture. I don't understand why people like eating it. Is there a type of food that you can't stand that everyone else around you seems to love? Any Indian food. The smell is abominable.

5) Pretend you're eating a Tex-Mex grill type restaurant where you can totally customize your items (think Chipotle, Qdoba, Freebirds World Burrito, Moe's Southwest Grill, etc.) and you're ordering a burrito. What fillings/toppings do you ask for? Cold water, I think!

6) Does it bother you when people bring their puppies/little dogs into grocery stores in those dog purses? It does if they have to open them to get their money out!

7) Has anyone ever un-friended you on Facebook (or another social network) for a really stupid reason? I ask because my minister's wife decided to un-friend me recently because I jokingly created an image of my name spelled in penis drawings. (It's a font called Cocksure). I unbfriend those who don't interact, or those who are not the ones I thought they were. You would be gone for sure!

8) What is your toothpaste personality type? Squashed, with all life out of it.

9) What is your favorite thing to do on your "lazy days?" Singer Bruno Mars apparently likes to dance around with men wearing monkey masks (click here to see what I mean) I don't do that! Sitting on my La-Z-Boy watching a favourite DVD tops it.

10) What is your absolute favorite thing to take pictures of? We all know what U.S. Congressman Anthony Weiner loves to take photos of, but with a last name of Weiner, what did everyone expect?  People are the most interesting thing. Landscapes are staid, but people are interesting, especially when caught unawares and are not posed.

Monday, 6 June 2011

The Queen's Meme #86 - The Cell Phone Meme

Mimi of The Queen's Meme has sent this in....

Welcome to The Queen's Meme
7 Royal Questions on Tuesday

Ring Ring! Viiiibbbbbbbrrrrraaattte. Buzzzzzz Buzzzzz
It's Mimi on the line. Electronic gadgets have taken over our lives it seems. I can't go anywhere without seeing someone talking on a cellular phone or fixated on one of the newest toys. Doesn't it annoy you? On the other hand, how did we ever get along without them?
Call or text 1-800-Bloggingham. We'll chat!

#86 The Cell Phone Meme

1. How important is a cell phone in UR life? This is the easiest meme EVER. I don't have a cell phone. Yes, you read that correctly, I DON'T HAVE a cell phone.

2. R U addicted to UR cell phone? See Answer to Question 1

3. R U a texter, an emailer, or a photo sender?    See above.

4. In the normal course of a day, about how many times do U touch UR cell phone? Is anyone reading my answers?

5. R U guilty of distracted driving? I don't drive either!

6. What is the 1 app never invented that needs to be made for UR cell phone? A decent one

7. What annoys U the most about cell phones these days?  The way people use them all the time, as if they are surgically attached to their ears.